Thought of Randomness

I kind of stopped blogging for a few days because I was a bit tired of talking about eating and exercising. It is kind of boring to write about and lately I have been feeling really imaginative and daydreaming my life away. Reality is just not fun to write about. If you must know, I did go to the gym a couple times, I did get a treadmill I have used a few times, I am eating better food but I am not doing so well with cutting back. I tend to get really hungry at night....Okay bla bla bla that is enough of that boringness.

So, I have been thinking a lot about my past writings and how I wished they were still around. When I was in about 6th or 7th grade I decided that I was going to write my life story. I had just read one of the Little House books (probably for the 18th million time) and decided it would be very interesting to write about my life so that girls my age in the future would know how life was. I was in complete denial then that the Little House books were in the fiction section for a reason. My book got to be about 3 pages long before I had told my whole story and that my life was pretty ordinary and boring. Still, I wish I had kept that notebook because it would be very interesting to see how I had perceived my life back then. I also had to write a poem book my sophomore year in high school. I was in a bit of a dark place then and was told they were rather good. I also have to say I usually am my most creative when I am sad, angry, and depressed so it might have actually been good to read.....and if it wasn't good I could at least have a laugh about it. However, I was embarrassed that they had so much feeling in them and threw them away. Why did I have to be such a self conscience teenager? The last thing I would love to read is the note passing book that my friend Kori and I had. It was no great literary work or anything, but it would be extremely hilarious and I am pretty sure it would be useful to occasionally pull out on bad days and have something to laugh about. 

The reason I have been thinking about this so much lately is that I do not have a lot of memories of my childhood. I can remember basics but it seems like everyone has way more specific memories then I did. Maybe if I would have kept something to help remind me then it may come back, or maybe my first "life story" hit the nail on the head about the fact that maybe there is nothing too exciting to remember. I have weird glimpses of memory though that I wish I understood what it meant. I have a memory of a fire and it being night. I have no idea if my house was on fire, a friends house was on fire, I happened to have rode past a house that was on fire, or if maybe I just had a dream about a fire. I think I might just obsess over this because I want to remember something exciting. That and I way over think basically everything. I guess I am done rambling now. 

Revisions

I have decided that my list of things I need to do this week followed with the how I did statement (and another list) is basically boring me to tears. I need new approach. The problem is I list everything out and then what happens? Just the worlds largest child meltdown in the history of my mommyhood on the very first day. Follow that with doctor appointments, sick babies, and the distraction of pinning all the things i want to do (but probably won't even do half) and I am bound to fail. So it's the first day of my list and I have failed to do anything on it but write my paper (and even that was 3 minutes late). The smart thing would be to move on and try again the next day......but oh no not me. I have to be an over achiever and tell myself i will do it all the next day. That shouldn't be too hard. Tuesday is my self proclaimed no schoolwork day (well I have to read Tuesday but no actual work of the school is to be involved). I did manage to ge my donation station done. It is basically a blue crate with a rack thing next to it.

The rest of the week I got all the basic house cleaning done. I went for a walk once, and I feel like I mostly followed my diet except for the occasional slip ups. I decided that I will still make myself to do list but maybe just take it a day at a time. I will just give summaries of how I feel I have been doing. This will keep me from getting overly discouraged when life presents me with bumps in the road. That way I am focusing on the positive and not the negative. Also, who wants to read a list. That sounds ridiculously boring. Alrighty well off to bed I go.